Kefka's Journal
by Hex20
Summary: I have always been interested in Kefka from Final Fantasy VI. Mostly on his past and how he steady turned into the man or monster we know in the game. This entry takes place after Kefka's infusion and what happens to his mind, and personality. Helpful criticism and critiques welcomed. (This story has ended, thank you and keep reading whatever you like! Do not stop creating!)
1. Chapter 1 First stop into the Decent

July 8, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

It has been exactly three days since my majictek infusion. Since then I have been experiencing vivid and horrifying morbid nightmares. Terrifying visions of people screaming, wailing, falling, and running through a burning world. Fire engulfing some in an eternal churning crucible. This continues until the ground starts creaking. It is as if the world itself is breaking apart. Then I hear a cruel, hysterical laughter. It laughs at the chaos below as if it is one big joke and this is the punch line. Soon I realize that the disgustingly joyous laughter is uncomfortably familiar. I turn and see the monster's face, but once I do fear overcomes me. I wake up, startled in a cold, freezing sweat. I cannot help but wonder, what these nightmares are trying to tell me?


	2. Chapter 2 The Nightmares Persist

July 13, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

It has been a week and the nightmares have only grown worse. Now instead of blurry faces they are faces of people I know. Soldiers in my care disappearing under a pile of rubble from a toppled building, or some falling into the cracks that the hungry earth is creating. The laughter is still there. Forever taking joy at their misery. Why is this happening? Dr. Cid told me it could be the after effects of the infusion.

"If these disturbing dreams persist," he told me "Come and see me again and we will see what we can do."

But if I do seek his help it will ruin my reputation I have built up with my men. No, I will wait these nightmares out. They will surely end soon.


	3. Chapter 3 Reality of Omens

July 16, Gestahlian year: 1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

The nightmares have stop, only for their place to be taken. Over the past few days I have been experiencing some sort of premonitions, or to be less extreme, visions. At first they were just quick flashes. Almost as if they had never occurred. Now however they are longer. Whenever I am in magic training I can see them. My opponent will be healthy on moment, but once I blink my eye he is burnt. His face frozen in terror as he gazes his charred eyes at me. Or even while I am walking around the city I had seen a wonderfully architectural building, only to blink and see it damaged with broken windows and charred walls alike my opponent. The people on the street stare at me with their terrified eyes. Again like my opponent, or even my soldiers in our resent battle. I can't take it, why do they make them? Those faces, why can't they act, or move? They never move their all like stone. It is, pathetic. I can find no other word to describe my feelings. Truly pathetic.


	4. Chapter 4 The Blurry become Clear

July 18, Gestahlian year: 1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

I was summoned to stand in front of the Emperor today. He had asked me to explain my actions from a few days past. I ask him in turn to explain what he meant because I did not understand the question. What actions? Could I have been committing subconscious felons while viewing the visions? Not only is that maddening, it is impossible, they are too quick. The Emperor informed me of one of my opponents from training being inflicted with serious burns. While he was telling me all this I suddenly remembered something quite, well to put it bluntly it was surprising and yet pondering. I purposely burnt my opponent. I remembered I got a strange need to test how much heat I could put into a single stream of flame. I thought about that soldier's burning body now being hosed and scrubbed. I thought about his screams he must admitting, that is if his vocal cords survived. My Emperor asked if it was a simple accident. I replied with honesty a "No."

"You willfully committed such wounds on a fellow soldier General Palazzo?" He asked me with more surprise then I was expecting from him.

"I admit it that I did, yes." I replied again with honesty. "I wished to experiment sir. To find out how hot and how long I could keep my fire going, but I needed a target. So there he was. Just standing there, not even moving. Hard as a stone. I did not want to be hit so, I threw my spell first. He did not even attempt to dodge it!"

"Do you feel any empathy or remorse for this?"

After he said that I stopped to think for a moment. I thought over his question quite a bit. I searched my feelings down to the last one. None of them matched what he had asked. I was almost startled. I caused an innocent man to spend the night, possibly the week in the infirmary. Why did I not even feel the smallest amount of guilt? I kept pondering this until Emperor Gestahl demanded an answer.

"No." I told him. "No sir, I do not. He was slow, weak. He should have been more aware. In battle you cannot just stand and prepare your next move. You must watch your enemy closely, and be ready to act in advance. It is simple. That soldier failed."

Gestahl stared at me. I knew the look. He knew I was right, but he would never admit it. He was going to say something else to make me seem guilty.

"Perhaps but what about that building in the city? If I recall the family of that soldier heard what you did and dropped their dirty dish water on you from their window."

I remembered this also. I was walking in the city, thinking over a failed strategy meeting. General Leo in his entire high and mighty ego told me my idea to weaken the targets with a nerve gas was to drastic, also adding that it was to much like most of my plans presently and it would not work. Everyone agreed, leaving me a laughing stock in front of my own men! I only wanted to let off my embarrassment and anger by going off by myself. Unbeknownst to me word had gone out of my "attack," on the burnt soldier. Coincidentally I walked right under the family of the man's kitchen window. They saw me and yelled "Monster," and threw a bucket of dirty water down on me! Anyone with eyes could see that I was not in a pleasant mood. So I threw a fireball through their window and used an earth spell to shake the building a little. Just to scare them, it was nothing that bad. But the screaming was terrible! You would think I killed one of them!

"That family attacked a head officer of you court. I was also defending myself and my rights as a citizen."

He just stared at me thoughtfully, and then let me be on my way.

"Do not let this happen again. My conquest cannot be impeded by your tantrums!"

"Of course, my lord."

I walked out of that room and pondered another thought which had just come to my mind. Why am I still under this man?


	5. Chapter 5 Night of the Colorful

July 24, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

Seven days of good behavior and what do I get for it? I get to go see some inane opera with the Emperor himself! No, not leading troops, not even training. Just a flashy, draining, sluggish, opera with absolutely no point besides the Emperor was wanting some fun! What a waster of my talents.

Five hours. Five hours and the fat ladies' singing is still ringing in my ears! By the Triad if I have to sit through another show I might just combust!... But I suppose it was not a total bore. In this opera there was one character that fascinated me. When this character came out there was so much emotion, so much comedy. Yet there was tension. The other characters on the stage with him were close to being afraid of him. My eyes were wrenched and forced to look at him. His colorful cloths, his bouncy jumpy and fact paced movements were all most too much for me! But I believe what had attracted my attention was his face. The makeup he wore enhanced the many twisted emotions he was displaying.

Why did he make such faces?

What emotions was he feeling?

Those are two questions I am still asking myself.

Afterword I came back to my room and practiced his faces in the mirror. Fascinating. I wonder, if I tried his techniques would the effect he had on the other characters be the same on my men? Or even the other generals? There is only one way to find out and I might just try it.


	6. Chapter 6 The Discomfort of Red

July 27, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

I have been trying my hand at cloth design these past few days. I have been trying to copy that character's style down to the last piece of thread, but I keep messing up! Either it is a tare here, or a frizz there! It is very annoying. I had asked the seamstresses for help, but NO! Instead they decided to ask me why! Why, why, why! Why ask? Just do it! So I decided to just finish it myself. Can't be to hard, just have to loop through here and…Son of a flaming horned monster…I just cut myself… It's creepy to see my own blood… I do not think I like it very much.


	7. Chapter 7 Dark Thought in Calming Battle

July 30, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

We had another battle today. Usually I would feel some form of disgust for the carnage around me, but today I was not bothered by it. Actually I was perfectly content. The foolish enemy, as it's armies hopelessly charged at us was a particularly fascinating sight for me. They must have known their "army," was no match for our superior training and technology so what puzzles me is why do they even try? There really is no sense in fighting against an enemy when one can't even hope to win! Its pure stupidity is what it is.


	8. Chapter 8 The Begrudged Homecoming

Aug. 2, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

What was supposed to be a one day battle turned into a three day squabble! Just when we all thought it was all good and safe in our new camp the enemy ambushed us! At night to boot, the cowards! Some incompetent must have underestimated them! This little feud lasted with the enemy retreating then returning in a guerilla warfare strategy. It took another day to get rid of the pests before General Leo arrived. He informed me the Emperor wished to see me. I told him that was quite stupid. I was in the midst of victory and could not make the trip back even if I wanted to! Apparently however Leo was sent not only to deliver the message but also to take over where I left off. So here I am in a land carrier back to Vector while the Emperor's message boy orders around my troops! Whatever Gestahl has to tell me it had better be worth it.


	9. Chapter 9 Talk of Reclusiveness

Aug. 4, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

I had my little chat with the Emperor today. He asked me of my progress in the conquest for the continent and if I had any trouble. Trouble? Why would he be concerned about that?

"I am simply wondering if it would be better if your, talents would be more useful here instead of on the field." He stated ever so carefully. It is unfortunate for him that careful words do not work with me.

"My lord, please stop walking on eggshells and tell me what you mean." I say to the winded man trying ever so hard to keep himself above my head.

"Very well general, I shall. It has come to my attention that you reported being…Bored on the battle field and so you have been acting out. Sending your troops to unstratigic raids, killing captured enemy soldiers without giving them their rights as a prisoner of war. All this at the expense of the troops under your command!"

"And?" I asked, his point not making sense to me.

"And this new dress style of yours…" He chose his words ever so carefully again. I am beginning to doubt even more that he will ever notice how foolish he sounds. The old never do. "I believe you need to remain here for possibly a month or more until you can calm yourself."

How do you tell the one above you that he is wrong on everything he is saying? How could he ever come up with something like this? I am if not the greatest general this so called empire as ever held in its arms, and he wants me to stay here like a common servant!

"What of me then? Do I get nothing out of this decision or am I just a stay-at-home floosy now?"

"No, listen to me. You will not be without your duties to perform. I promise."

"And they would be?"

Gestahl simply smiled at me and told me good night as if I was a child. I would have given him a piece of my mind for not telling me what these "duties," were but he had his own personal guard surrounding him. I may be one of the most skilled people in intelligence and fighting but I would rather not risk having my body strung up be my hair as the rest of me is whipped and beaten thanks. Better wait till the old man can clear his mind. This will take a while, I can already tell.


	10. Chapter 10 The Final Break

Aug. 6, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Balance and Conquest.

As I predicted, Emperor Gestahl took more time then needed to tell me what he had in mind. And what he had in mind was enough to make anyone want to give him a lobotomy for even thinking it.

"You want me to be your what? I asked him this question a few times today. Now that I think about it I'm still questioning it!

"I want you to become my court mage. With your prowess in magic and technological skill, the Esper program will go ahead of schedule."

Like I would buy that. I know what he wanted by having me back. He wants me out of the way of his precious "conquest," but I wasn't going to let him get away with it.

"So what am I? A common scientist? And what is my side job? A magician? Shall I perform a trick for you?" I think I scared him right then because his guard shifted to the front of him and had their hands on their weapons. It is almost uncanny how they can sense danger like dogs.

"Please General Palazzo calm yourself! You will still keep your rank and the benefits that come with it. Think of this as an addition title."

"An addition does not always mean useful." I told him to his face. No way is he putting an extra weight on me without some collateral. "What do I have to do? Also, what do I get in return?"

I saw a slight pause on my "lord's" face after I had asked him that. Was he surprised that I even asked in general? Who did he think I am? Some lackey that will just accept more work like a dog in a hunt without dinner later?

"Hmm… We will discuss the benefits after you are informed of your duties." He told me and just as I figured he hadn't thought over it at all.

"One of your duties will be monitoring the majitek armor and checking their systems. Training out new majik knights and…"

Just before he finished Dr. Cid came in with a young women, at least twenty or so. I knew her from her blonde hair and ice cold eyes/ She was Cid's little "prodigy" Clese Chere. To sum her up quickly would be to take your average little orphan story and place a chance accouter with a lot of luck. That is about it, nothing too special about her.

"My apologizes for interrupting but if you are ready, Celes has finished mastering all the known starter spells and is ready to head out into battle." Cid informs the entire room like a noisy ox. I had all most forgotten that Celes had went through the infusion only three days ago and had since been shown to be an irritating know it all. Studying, and training as if she's some model student that everyone should look up to. Someone needs to get her a reality check and fast! It also does not help that everyone keeps talking about her! I was the reason that the little girl is not buried in the ground right now so where is the talk about me?

"You have my forgiveness Dr. Cid. Are you certain she is ready?"

"Yes my lord. In fact if General Palazzo would agree I would suggest a test of her skills."

A test? Really, to be frank I disagreed right then. I was just about to finally hear whatever the Emperor had to tell me and get out. But of course I did not get a choice in the matter because Emperor Gestahl spoke for me!

"I am sure General Palazzo would enjoy some exercise, wouldn't you General?" He asks with a smug look on his royal face. He was only speaking for me to put me under his thumb including wanting a show. But, then again who am I to deny a willing audience!

I agreed thinking it would be over with one ice blast to her legs to stop her movement. Little did I know Celes had already mastered the Rune Sword technique which consumed any spell I attempted to hit her with! And even if I did manage to hit her she would dodge one spell and consume another which gave her time to heal! By the end she had me at a stand still with messed up hair and bruised arms and legs. But her face oddly enough was calm and remained untouched. I was going to change that little tid bit if Gestahl hadn't stooped me.

"I have seen enough. Dr. Cid please send Miss. Chere to join General Leo on the field. She will be taking partial control while General Palazzo is being detained here."

"Wait." I spoke out at this decision. This horribly stupid, stupid decision! "So I'm not only being kept here unwillingly, but a girl without any prior field training is going out to cover a general's command? Tell me how any of this makes any lick of sense."

"Kefka," He actually used me name. My name, just with that I knew this was not going to end well. "From what I have seen Celes shown her potential through your defeat."

"My defeat? If I recall correctly we were at a stand off which I would have ended if you had not stopped me."

"You would have lost regardless. With Celes' sword and well thought out actions would have trumped you in the end."

Trumped me? What was he trying to say? That I'm weak? That I can't win a minor dual? Who did he think he was insulting?

"Now then if that is all you can all leave."

I stayed of course. I needed to know everything about this new "station" first.

"Yes, Kefka?" From his tone to his usage of my name I could tell he wasn't in the mood for me to be there, but to be frank right then I just didn't give a hoot.

"My Emperor, you didn't finish telling me of my duties and benefits."

"Yes…Well, if you do not mind after that dual I am quite exhausted. We shall go over your duties tomorrow."

"What of the benefits?"

"Benefits? What benefits? From what I understand this is a new position which is just starting out and in short has no benefits." He sneered at me. I know he sneered at me with his old wrinkled face oh so smug. "I shall see you tomorrow, till then stay out of my sight. I cannot stand to even look at you at the moment."

I could not believe my ears. He not only shamed, mocked, made look like a fool, and he had the gall to dismiss me by ordering his guards to back me out the door! The long winded old fool! I think I hate him. Oh yes, I know I do. Every time he looks or speaks to me. Every time he breaths! I HATE him! But, but it's not just him, it's everyone! Every one of those sickening, filthy, weak little piles of dirt you find just waiting around for nothing. Spreading their stupid, useless, just pathetic lives around everywhere as if they own where ever they feel like stepping on! I hate them! That is all I can think about right now is how much I want them all gone! Yes, gone! Goner then a hunting bird versus a rabid dog! Also to be honest, I might as well take over this place and make it my own! I would do a better job then long beard the wannabe emperor Gestahl! I KNOW I would! Actually no, I will! Oh yes I will! It doesn't matter how as long as I succeed. I will need to be sneaky, quick, lay low like a peaceful and loyal soldier. I will also need more power then I have now, more then ever. Enough to topple the world or even beyond that! And once, once I take over then all will know how insignificant they all really are. Because as much as they boast about all their accomplishments in reality all of it matters as much as forgotten fantasies! Just useless dreams and hopes! Once a man figures out that once he is at his end, that all he was in the end was worm food he will know that even if he is the greatest hero ever it was all for nothing! Nothing at all! But not me, no, not me! I know something, something that is going to stretch me to the top! Gestahl is planning something with these Espers that are more than anyone can guess. I've noticed, I've seen the things that go down in the factory. He's planning something big and I WILL be apart of it! I will, I will, I WILL! Everlasting, that is who I will be! I will!


	11. Chapter 11 Irony of Events

Aug. 7, Gestahlian year:1988. Time of Me and for Me.

I have begun planning on Gestahl's inevitable down fall. And wouldn't you know it the fool himself as given me an excellent starting point! As my first 'job,' as court mage I was to of course, take care of the majitek armor and over see repairs, even if engineering was never on my resume. Over looking the esper extraction which will definitely become useful to me once I get permission to view them alone and now something very fascinating. It seems the little green haired scrap of a kid they found in the esper world a few years before I joined has grown up! It was rather difficult for the lab officials to bring her in, seeing as esper's are naturally aggressive once provoked and will do anything to attack and then flee their captors. Such dumb and yet strongly powerful creatures. Even after the girl had been tranquilized she still had to be literally bonded with a metal chain like a dog just so she would not get away!

"This girl will prove a great asset to our conquest with her unique genetic make up," Gestahl told me, even though I had already knew that and him just telling me over again really did not improve my already incredibly, extremely, and unseemly low opinion of him. "It will be your duty, general, to over see her training and if need be test her abilities to see how far her actual limits are."

"I would absolutely LOVE to! But, how do I control her if she needs to be put out like a light every time someone comes in to feed her?" I asked his almighty wiseness.

"Do whatever you see necessary. Just as long as she is following orders." At least he is learning to give me free range on these little assignments he had me on. Soon enough he'll probably give me the esper part of the Magik Factory along with the Magitek part too!

After that exhausting meeting I finally got to order the green girl, or Terra as I am told she is called even though it hardly matters to me, back to her cell. I will need to devise a way to control her mind without lying on injections and chains useful as they are. Perhaps a device close to her head that can also limit her freewill? Might work, but anyways my bright and showy make up FINALLY arrived! I have been experimenting and have found several combinations to my liking! I have even developed some other ideas for clothing to go along with the make up ideas! So many wondrous ideas! No wonder I am a genius! And tomorrow is going to be the day I'm really going to express it!

_La Commedia è finita!_


End file.
